Between some struggles I am happily reflecting my life. Thinking about things and friends that enrich my life. Now that I have plenty of time. Time to think, time to socialize, time to craft and create. 2017. The year I quit my job – not because I have another one, but because I don’t want one anymore. Time for a timeout, a creative voyage to somewhere. 2017 is also the year I am turning thirty. T H I R T Y!! Can’t believe it. Won’t believe it. Where did the roaring twenties go? Haven’t they just started? It feels like walking towards a big big door which must be the entrance to another stage of life. Am I ready to open that door and enter?
Not sure, I think I’d rather make a loop, a long detour, if I could. I honestly don’t remember feeling like this when turning twenty. Turning twenty was cool. Not the same now. Turning thirty doesn’t feel to be something you just let happen happy and peppy from one day to the other without being prepared. But what to prepare? Should I question my career path? Start thinking about kids? Knowing that I haven’t ever really strictly planned something in my life [ except maybe my travels ] makes me even more shaky. Seems that so far everything rather happened as a flow of great coincidences [ or was it destiny?]. Is that a good sign? Will this flow continue and everything be alright just as it was up to now? …..can you feel me?
Well, with these struggles towards the future – I am happily reflecting the past. While reflection might look like a quiet session of daydreaming, it more feels like an active process of reviewing parts, moments, friendship or adventures of my life. All the years of happiness, lively and vibrant memories for life, wonderful people hopping on and off along my way or staying with me until today. Thoughts, things and friends that make my life so precious. I realize now that my busy working life didn’t leave enough room to reflect. Everything was just going and that was important. It’s different now that I got plenty of time, slooow down time. Reflecting makes me feel grateful and confident for the future. It’s a conscious process which makes me learn from my experiences and more important – gain trust in the flow of my life. And somehow deep inside I feel that the journey will continue being so wonderful. With closed eyes I am dreaming on, hearing my inner voice repeating: go lucky girl – everything will be a alright!
I am curious to know how turning thirty does or did feel for you. Let me know in the comments!